Jardana Peacock reached out to me to invite me to contribute to a practice guide for white people showing up for racial justice.
I asked: who is the audience for this? What is the purpose? Why just 'white people'? These practices are useful in different ways for everyone. What is the most useful format? Who will even use this? Wouldn't it be better to try to get my organization to do this instead of just me?
We need your voice, she said. We need it now.
I drafted something on a 5-hour plane ride. I looked for a place on my trip I could find some quiet space to record. Tried to find a spot to show the mountains in the background or to avoid the noise of the festival and hotel around me. Put on makeup and a flowy scarf so I would look more mature like maybe I knew what I was talking about. Walked up the mountain to find a space outside and even the wind was too loud in the microphone. Gave up.
5 days later, came home on a redeye, post-yoga-90-degrees-sweating-in-NYC, and took a stab at a first recording. Emailed it to Jardana just to prove I was still alive. It's a first draft, I said. I need to re-record. It's too long. Too wordy. Not clear enough. I can do a better job weaving in the story. The stills on the video make me look like a puppy-eyed little girl. Why do I look so concerned when I talk?
I can make this better. Just give me some time.
Please don't re-record, she said. Part of undoing white supremacy is showing up imperfectly. Chiming in now. Giving what we've got and letting it be enough. Words Kerri Kelly says often come to my mind: "Start before you're ready." My organizing friends and mentors Carlos Saavedra and Paul Engler chime in too: Vulnerability is everything.
So here I am, with the offerings I could have done more skillfully, more masterfully, more impressively, but here -- in a practice of revealing and moving in and saying yes to the urgency of hearts-wide-open for racial justice and wholeness in our times... committed to #practiceshowingup.
I hope this resource can be of use as we continue to build on it together and commit ourselves to taking risks with hearts-wide-open for the inner and outer work of racial justice. Click the image above to access the free resource guide, featuring my practices alongside offerings from incredible leaders, some of whom are friends and others who I hope will become friends soon.
Let's keep practicing.